Exploring Ultra

When you think about the times that have made you feel most alive, what comes to mind?

Does your mind run to sandy white beaches in the Caribbean with an icy cocktail in hand? How about a decadent meal during a vacation in France or Italy? Perhaps its unleashing the urge to go on a shopping spree or catching the latest Broadway play...

If any of these types of experiences encapsulate the moments you've felt most alive, this post may not resonate with you... because nothing described above cracks my top ten list of 'Feeling Alive' moments.

During moments of reflection over the past year, I've been a conscious observer of the inherent pull I feel towards comfort. We all experience it, seeking comfort in all domains: the weather, food, exercise, friends, communication...this isn't an inherently bad thing, but as I've grown older, I recognize in myself:

An inverse relationship between comfort and vitality.

I don't feel the most alive when I'm the most comfortable, its typically the inverse. The moments in life where uncertainty, sacrifice or difficulty is at a peak, a similar peak manifests in my vitality.

Whether it be learning to mountain bike in the hills of California or traversing the Grand Canyon with a weighted vest, I'm convinced we need struggle as much (or more so) than we need comfort.

Its under this banner of seeking uncertainty and challenge that in September 2022 I signed up for my first 'Ultra' marathon. In ~3 days, I'll be embarking on a 50 mile trail race on Catalina Island, which is located ~20 miles off the coast of Orange County, CA.

Even in my four short months of intentional prep, a slew of fears and insecurities which have rose to the foreground. Here is a punch list of the demons I've been battling in recent weeks:

1. A positive Covid diagnoses 4 weeks from race day
2. A nagging foot injury which brough my training program to a halt for two weeks as I needed to aggresively ramp mileage
3. I still walk (i.e., not run) uphills to avoid spiking my heart rate, and this race has 6,000 ft of elevation gain
4. The longest training run i've completed is ~25 miles (50% of race distance) and the longest road race I've ever participated in is a half marathon (26% of race distance)

I'm writing this post primarily for me... to document my 'why' for running and to chronicle the fears which visit me on the eve of the race....

AND

I'm writing this in the hope that it may inspire one or two people who take the time to read... re-surfacing the importance of cultivating a life which seeks challenge and uncertainty. Your 'ultra' will look different than mine, maybe your 'ultra' is at the day job, or at home with your kids.

Whatever the domain, I'm confident there is an energizing YET unsettling calling which lurks in the recesses of your mind. I hope that the sharing of my journey emboldens you to take even one step towards that calling.

If you want to follow along for my 'Ultra', there are three things you can do:

1. You can follow along on Twitter (@ryanaylward1) as I plan on posting a few intra-race updates while on the course (cell service permitting)
2. If you really want to nerd out, the race provides runner-specific tracking which you can access through this link https://ac100.com/live/av50/HTML/Mobile/map.htm?243
3. Look out for a post-race update on Strava where I track everything. I'll probably include some pics from the course.

Find your Ultra.

Appreciate everyone who has supported me as I look to tackle mine.

Talk Soon,

Ryan ✌️